Zombie Strippers (2008)

At last, after more than a century of being banned and censored, the last remaining unpublished work by the Bronte sisters has come to the silver screen.

Can you still call it a silver screen if the movie is in color?

But I digress.

The work was created not by the three Bronte sisters you are probably familiar with, but the lesser-known Kimmi Bronte, the Bronte's saucy little tart of a half-sister. Interestingly, her original manuscript for Zombie Strippers had hearts over both "i's" in the title instead of those boring old dots.

Imagine this cast: Kenneth Branagh, Meryl Streep, Jack Nicholson, Al Pacino, Siobhan McKenna, and the legendary reclusive acting genius Nicol Williamson ...

Those are just six of the many great actors who neither appeared in this film nor would even be willing to acknowledge having heard of it.

Although I'm pretty sure Nicholson would like it.

"A female demon hell-bent for revenge"

Getting your female demons bent by hell is so predictable, and so overpriced. It's like getting your car repairs done at an authorized dealership, the metaphysical equivalent of shaking hands with Mr. Badwench. Personally, I get all of my female demons bent by a local chop shop over in the warehouse district. OK, sometimes Manuel doesn't use genuine parts, but he does the job just as well as Satan, and at half the price.

You may have noticed that I've given up on reviewing grade-B genre movies unless they are hot off the presses. That fact might lead you to wonder why I'm looking at the previous work of a director who has three more recent films to ridicule. Fair enough. The reason is that it's from the writer/director of Zombie Strippers, which I watched last week with some curiosity. While I didn't find Zombie Strippers to be a classic of either gorotica or horror/comedy, I was impressed by its high energy level and its unabashedly depraved sense of humor, so I wondered whether those characteristics had been prominent in the auteur's previous offerings, and I picked up a used copy of The Slaughter for five bucks from Amazon Marketplace.