Guarded Secrets is an erotic thriller, but very short on erotic.
Not that thrilling either.
As the film opens, Mark Long is doing the nasty in a motel with
Gabriella Hall. He wakes up in the morning to discover that she has
left with his car and his money. That should have taught him a
lesson about picking up hitchhikers and rescuing damsels in
distress. He elects to thumb to somewhere he can get back on his
feet, and is picked up by Billy Maddox, who, it turns out, is head
lifeguard at a posh resort, and has an opening. As our boy was on
his way to join the Navy Seals when the hitch occurred in his plans,
he gets the job. He will be paid to sit next to a pool all day,
watch beautiful women, and screw many of them The only hitch is
Michael Russo, a frightening criminal type. Of course, our hero,
faced with an endless smorgasbord of willing women, decides to
seduce and rescue the gangster's wife, Lesli Kay. After he saves the
gangster from drowning, he is admitted into the gang, and becomes
painfully aware of what she puts up with, and just how bad Russo is.
So, will our boy scout save the fair damsel and vanquish the evil
gangster? To find out, you will have to suffer through this just
like I did.
This marks the first time I have ever complained about excess
plot content in a soft-core porn flick. I love a little story with
my porn, but obviously the story should be interesting, which this
And also there should still actually be some porn.
If you are not familiar with our grading system, you need to
explanation, because the grading is not linear. For example, by
our definition, a
C is solid and a C+ is a VERY good movie. There are very few Bs
and As. Based on our descriptive system, this film is a: